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What's a woman to do who can't quite attain the Big O? Also, a man fears his wife will leave him for a vibrator. Sexploration answers your queries. Got a question? E-mail us. I am a year-old woman. I am fairly attractive and have been separated from my husband for three years after a marriage of 38 years.
My issue is with achieving orgasm. I was wondering if Cialis would be effective since it increases blood flow and might help me orgasm more often. I am 43 and have three grown children. I know sex feels good, but nothing like what my friends tell me it feels like. How can I tell if I am having an orgasm?
In surveys, about a quarter of American women report some sort of orgasm snafu, either not being able to have one at all called anorgasmia or often getting close without being able to take that blissful leap over the edge. Not surprisingly, the leading figures among those who are trying to solve such riddles are all women, like Dr.
But even they cannot say for sure what makes an orgasm.
This is because orgasm is a very complicated dance between the emotions and biology. So a year-old newly single woman may be affected both by the relationship change and by the biology of menopause. Testosterone levels drop, estrogen levels drop, body systems age, medications may interfere. Other contributors to orgasm trouble include nicotine smoking can kill your sex life before it kills yousome anti-depressants, obesity and cardiovascular disease.
So stay in shape and lose the extra pounds. Psychology is important, too. Some were made more aware of their own bodies through the use of a mirror while others were not. Guilt, anxiety, depression, religion, education level, socio-economic level, can all become like bricks in a dam preventing the rush of water from releasing its energy.
Behavioral therapy has shown some promise in removing some bricks. Other techniques like sensate focus — practicing intense concentration on the feel of erotic stimulation while blocking other thoughts — has also worked. Some women have found relief through hormones like topical estrogen and testosterone though testosterone therapy remains controversial. A suction machine called the Eros Clitoral Therapy Device, available by prescription, has helped some women regain orgasmic ability.
It works by engorging the clitoris with blood. Sometimes difficulty with orgasm can feed on itself, like insomnia. Just as after a sleepless night, you can become anxious about falling asleep the next night, after having trouble with an orgasm, your head can be full of worries about having an orgasm. Many therapists suggest practice, practice, practice with vibrators or fingers or whatever works.
Go solo at first so there is no pressure to perform. The last thing you want is for a lover to lose patience and switch on an old episode of "Green Acres. Here is one definition used by experts like Meston and the World Health Organization:. Sexy, no? I am wondering if vibrators can have an unintended side effect. It seems to me that after a woman starts using a vibrator, foreplay and intercourse will not be able to stimulate the clitoris as intensely as the vibrator does.
I ask because this has happened with my wife and me. I thought it was just us, but then a few other friends have brought this up. All of the wives went to the same vibrator party, so were all introduced to vibrators at the same time. So, did you talk about this while cooking bratwurst at the neighborhood Fourth of July barbecue? We here at Sexploration are just curious how the topic came up. While a vibrator can numb a clitoris for a very short time, like minutes, the probable cause of the trouble is that they create a different sensation.
This is good; it expands the menu. But if a woman comes to expect that same feeling to always be the one that pushes her over the edge, she can become frustrated. So keep the toys in the sock drawer for a little while and then slowly integrate them again. IE 11 is not supported.
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